I love phishing and Nigerian scam letters. I love receiving letters from the late wife of the former president of Burkina Faso, when they cannot even spell “Burkina Faso” correctly. There is something to be said for human stupidity and greed. I’ve just received a new scam letter. It is better written than other similar letters, so I will reproduce it here with my comments in blue (red was a bit annoying):
UNITED NATIONS ORGANISATION
IN CONJUNCTION WITH THE INTERNATIONAL MONETARY FUND
WORLD BANK FACT-FINDING & SPECIAL DUTIES OFFICE
[Impressive name-dropping here. UN, IMF and the World Bank, all in the first three lines!]
Office of The Director Special duties.
London, United Kingdom
[First mistake. We are asked to believe that this UN worker is sending this message from his MSN account. The phone number is a mobile phone number. Don’t they have offices at the UN-IMF-WB?]
Special duties reference
UNO/WBF – UK
DIPLOMATIC BOX 55KG
[That sounds impressive, we have a code!]
To the Beneficiary,
[Another typical scam flag, you are never addressed by name]
The World Bank Group, Fact Finding & Special Duties office In conjunction with the United Nations Organization, has received part of your pending payment with reference number (LM-05-371) amounting to US$ 5Million (Five Million United State Dollars) out of your contractual/inheritance funds from our ordering contractor Bank quoting reference to UNO/WBF LM-05-371, the said payment is been arranged in a Security-proof box weighing 55kg padded with synthetic nylon. According to information gathered from the bank’s security computer we were notified that you have waited for so long to receive this payment without success, we also confirmed that you have not met all statutory requirements in respect of your pending payment.
[Why would the UN and the World Bank handle inheritance boxes? Are the funds contractual/ or inheritance? This is tailored for people who have no idea how the UN works]
You are therefore advised to contact our Payment Clearance Department to obtain necessary information to the Security Courier Service Company that is specialized in sending diplomatic materials and information from one country to another, which also has diplomatic immunity to carry consignment (Box) such as this.
[Where to start with this one? Why does anybody require diplomatic immunity to carry consignment boxes? ]
This office has met with this Security Courier Service and concluded shipping arrangement with them,therefore shipment will commence as soon as we have your go ahead order,the diplomat who will be bring in this Consignment(Box) to you is an expert and has been in this line of work for many years now so you have noting to worry about.
[They could at least try to get their grammar right]
After all arrangements we have concluded that you must donate Five Hundred Thousand United States Dollars (USD500,000.00) to a charity organization we designate to you as soon as you receive your money. To this effect, in your response you should send to us a promissory note promissing to donate the stated about and also with your address where you will like the Box to be delivered. Please maintain topmost secrecy as it may cause a lot of problems if found out that we are using this media to help you. Therefore you are advised not to inform anyone about this until you received your money.
[Finally! Here is the hook. They are making you a favour by bringing this in, but you will have to do something in order to get it.]
The above requirement qualifies you for final remittance process of the received sum. Please confirm message granted with “GO AHEAD ORDER” on mail:
[Yeah, sure. You can steal my DVD collection while you’re at it as well.]